Day Eleven, 2025

 Food Chain Curry bowl & a pint for courage

We have not won a single game but the boys battled hard and our coach is a gentleman.  We've only played 2 games so far and the last one starts in a couple hours but youngest is outside of his bedroom, miles from his computer, hanging with others and hopefully connecting.  This is why we do it.

Am I hoping that he'll have more friends and not feel lonely - heck yes I am. 

Is that what gave me the courage to let my guard down and feel able to chat & joke around with the other parents - heck yes it did.

While at work you begin to let your guard down out of familiarity with your co-workers.  This is different.  I want to be a good wife and a mother who doesn't embarrass my child chatting with people I'll probably see in my community - it's an extra level.

In our old town the jobs I had made my face known so there was no way to avoid others.  I started shopping out of town to have peace.  Living in this town we're pretty obscure, maybe seeing a friendly face on occasion but those are just our kids friends usually and our immediate neighbours as we come and go so it almost feels a bit unsafe to be putting myself out there.\

Fact is I want to be a part of a community again - but only a little bit.  I like my solo walks and quiet grocery store trips.  

If only my introverted-ness hadn't effected my youngest child's social skills - I'm really worried that it has and find I'm kicking myself for getting to the point where I was avoiding people so thoroughly that I didn't encourage 'play-dates'.

No do-overs are possible so I'm trying to correct the ship now.

Game three starts in 1.5 hours - LET's GO KRAKEN!!

C

Action VS Grief